Boy Trouble

I gotta boy,
got boy trouble
-Bananarama


I'm officially mad at all the men in my life right now.

First, my dad asked if I'd sent an email I discussed with him. I value his idea, I really do. I meant to send it, I just ran out of time. If you don't believe me, I could make a list of OTHER things I forgot to do too! But he gave me a hard time, saying he knew I wouldn't send it, I don't have the guts. OK, whatever. If anything, when it comes to confronting people, I've got more guts than sense. He said nothing will ever change if I don't send it, despite the fact I'd just told him that the Boy got into the last game and played a lot. A lot! Maybe more than half the game!

It just got me because he was trying to be mean and cranky, and he hadn't done that with me in a long, long time. Maybe 20 years. I blew it off, but it better not turn into a regular thing with him...

Then an old friend asked K to come visit him in Santa Monica. As I mentioned before, K works nearly every day now, so I was looking forward to having a Sunday together. I asked if our friend couldn't come here, after all, K has been driving around SO MUCH! K went to play basketball, and the Girl and I went to JoAnne's Fabrics. Later, at home, K called and said he'd tried to reach me after the game on my cell. When I didn't answer, he assumed we were still shopping, and went ahead and drove to Santa Monica.

That was SO like him, to fabricate a misunderstanding so that he could do whatever he wanted. I feel like I'm understanding about his being gone all the time for his job. I was even understanding about his playing basketball. But I drew the line at Santa Monica, and he didn't care. He did what he wanted.

It's strange how I can go from being so happy with him for so long. Then he does something like this, and I can't believe how my emotions turn it all around. Every time he doesn't put my feelings first, it's like the first time all over again except it's worse from the memories of all the other times he put his friends first.

He came home in the evening "to spend time with me." But by then I was seriously pissed, and wanted nothing to do with him.

Then all afternoon the Boy had been upstairs with with his friend and girlfriend. The dishwasher was on, so I couldn't hear them that well. Later I went upstairs and everyone was gone! He didn't even say goodbye to me! Nobody did!

So now I'm mad at him too.

Grrrr....

Crazy Night

These last couple of days have definitly been crazy. Last night the Falcons played Pasadena. K was taking the Girl to a Father-Daughter dance at her school, so I drove there with S, the Boy's girlfriend. Right before we left, K came to the van to get his phone out of the glove compartment. Then, the door to the glove compartment wouldn't close! That happened in our old Previa too, so wehen we got there, I used the key to see if I could lock the glove compartment closed. I turned the key back and forth, but it wouldn't work. Next thing I knew, the key broke off! In the lock! What the....???

I stuck the key into the ignition, but it would no longer start the car. I called K, who was just walking into the dance.

K - Hi, what's up?
Me - The key broke off!
Silence
Me - I was trying to shut the door to the glove compartment, and the key just broke!
Silence
Me - Hello? Hello? Did you hear me?
Silence
K - Yeah, (pause) I heard you.

Well, I couldn't very well tell him to leave the dance and come get us in an hour, so I told him I'd try to find a ride home. Huh. Stuck in Pasadena with my son's girlfriend. Luckily, I found our neighbor down the street, who was there watching her daughter's game. The varsity girls won by one point in overtime.

The varsity boys had previously lost the last game (at home) to Pasadena by only a few points, so we were hoping for a victorious rematch. Pasadena is the toughest team in our league, altho their recent 37-game winning streak was recently ended by lowly Burbank. One of our starters had gotten into trouble, so a Senior that played last game (when the Boy didn't play at all) was going to start.

The game started out badly, and the starters didn't look very good. The senior that got to start didn't start well at all. They quickly got behind by about 10 points. One of the "best" players on the team had his father there visiting to see the game. He works in another state and isn't getting to see much of his son, who has been a promising player for so long, play in his senior year.

But he was visiting last night, and his son never looked so bad. He was overconfident twice bringing up the ball, and twice had it stripped from him. Plus the opposing player dunked the ball while he was getting up from the floor.

Other guys were out there really trying, but they still couldn't seem to get a rebound or keep Pasadena from going to the hoop.

The Boy had once had a scoring high on this team (28 pts!), so maybe that's why he got to play a pretty long time in this game, but they ended up losing by 18 points. My Boy didn't make many mistakes, and he played pretty well against them. They had him guarding Pasadena's biggest, tallest player! Plus he took it inside a few times and got most of his free throws. So I felt badly for everyone last night, except maybe my Boy.

Then we got a ride home, and arrived home just as K and the Girl were getting home from the dance. I asked S to stay and watch the Girl and pick up the Boy, as we had to ride back to Pasadena to get the van. I'd forgotten that K leaves a lot of his team's equipment (jerseys!) in the back, and I'd been afraid to lock the door since I didn't have a key. The high school isn't in a bad part of town, but I was worried just the same.

Luckily, his gear and the van were still there when we got there, so we drove home without any problem.

We got home and settled in in front of the TV. Then S got a call from her family that her father might be having a heart attack, and she ran out to go to the hospital.

It turned out later that he was OK, but still, what a crazy night!

Blindsided

Since K could see (on tape) that the Boy was playing well, and since everyone was telling him how well the Boy was playing, K decided to take the day off. It's the Boy's senior year, and K can hardly go to any of the games due to work, so he was excited to get to see the Boy play.

Except he didn't play. At all. Not one single second.

The Boy wasn't upset, he just doesn't understand it. I don't think any of the players do.

But K was upset. That's all he could talk about all night after that. Why, why, why.

Why?

A week in my life

My life seems so busy sometimes, I don't know how I keep up with it!
Here we go...

work week-----------

My tax job has kicked in again, and I really like my boss there, but it doesn't pay much. I've told her I need to find a "real" job, and I think she was offended, but I don't think she's really hearing me. Another thing I don't like about the company is that they're always trying to get us to do their marketing for them. If I signed up to be a marketer, I'll be a marketer. This job, I signed on for another reason. Besides, if I'm going to market, I'll do it for my sales job! I already have one of those!

On Wed my boss said we needed to go out and hand out flyers. I told her I wasn't comfortable with that, and she said "OK, we'll do it tomorrow." So I called in sick on Thursday. Blech.

My sales job is laid back with my boss gone - too much so! I think I'll have two sales coming up this year, but that's not enough anymore. I want vacations! I want more shopping trips! I want to keep this job, but I need a supplement right now.

The whole situation with the receptionist in the sales office was somehow reversed. I think it's because the phone company that set it up reset the number to ring in our office. Despite the fact that the whole point of getting this new system was so that the phones would ring in another office entirely. I don't know why they're not insisting that the phone company get it right. Another senseless waste of money. I liked the old phone system much better.

I feel guilty about my teaching job, as I may have to quit soon. Before the Christmas break, one of the kids came up to me and said, "Come back, ok?". I think they're somewhat used to teachers disappearing, but what else can I do? It would be nice to find another (good paying) job that's part time so that I could do both.

I can dream, can't I?

Home Life---------------

The Girl has been busy with sports and girl scouts and activities with her friends. Last night I was thinking about all the shows and people I know about only because I have kids of a certain age. I thought about this last night as the Girl and I watched a "Bring it On" marathon. I think they're up to 4 movies now! I think Beyonce's sister is in the 3rd one.

Speaking of TV sisters, almost immediately after Jamie Lynn Spears announced she was pregnant, the show she was on announced that Zoie (Jamie Lynn's character) was leaving for London! And now there's another special when she comes back. Seems like they've been preparing for this for a few months.

The Boy had two games last week. He's getting to play an increasing amount of time, partly I think in response to an oh-so-diplomatic email I sent the coach a few weeks ago. But the coach has gone back and forth on this, sometimes playing a boy, then not playing him for 2-3 games. If a kid makes a mistake - forget it. It's very hard on the parents, some of us who are not used to seeing their child NOT play. Will we be happy? Will we be sad? We never know. Now I feel guilty for sending the email because now other boys are not getting to play (at all), and I feel badly for their parents. Because I know how it feels. And I feel partly responsible, having put in a good word for MY boy.

Sigh.

But the Boy has been playing, and playing well, and the team is winning more than their losing, so that's all good. I just want the Boy to have a good Senior year, at this point. He's happy with his girlfriend, with his job, with his video projects. We don't see him much, but I guess that's normal.

The Girl had a basketball game last night, and her team won 28-8. The Girl scored 10 points, outscoring the other team by herself! She and her team were VERY happy. I felt sorry for the other team after awhile. It reminded me of when the Boy was her age, and I was writing the same thing about him in my journals.

A few months ago, K accepted the role as basketball coach for the camp he works at. He works at a camp for juvenile delinquents, the only one that has sports in this county. Think 'Gridiron Gang". (They got the Rock to play K!) We knew it would be hard work, but it's even harder than we thought. He's gone almost all the time now and I miss his help and companionship. But I know it's only for a month or so more. I think the hardest thing for him, even harder than all the time or all the driving or the lack of support that he's experienced, is that they almost never win.

I think it's hard for most men to ever say that it's OK to not win. (Forget about the L word!) But I told him that he has to FIND a way to make it OK for the kids, because the reality of their team is that players are constantly changing (getting released, getting in trouble) and that makes it even harder to come together as a team. It has to be an esteem-building experience for the kids in this program. If he can find a way to make it OK for the kids, it will be OK for him as well.

Family week ----------------

I got a call from my sister E on Tuesday saying that she and my Mom had gone up to my duplex to meet the lady from the City, who's doing an inspection. We've been working to get a City-subsidized tenant into the unit, and things had been going smoothly. But when my sister got there, the inspector was on her way out, upset that a smoke detector didn't work and she couldn't check the stove because the countertop installer was there. Great!

The next day, my Mom called to ask, "What color was the countertop supposed to be? I thought you told me it would be white, but it was brown and I signed off on it!" Gosh, it didn't even occur to me that the countertop people might make a mistake like that, so I didn't make sure my sister knew to check for that! My Mom felt so bad about that and the failed inspection, but it really wasn't her fault.

I got it worked out with the countertop people, but just now my Dad called to say that I should also get them to move the cabinet closer to the stove, too, as it's too far away. What? Take it easy, everybody.

I have enough to do.