Father's Day 07

K had a really nice Father's Day I think. He really deserved one, just because he's a great father that does LOADS of things for his kids. Also, for a variety of unforseen reasons, he didn't have that great of a birthday. So I tried to make the day nice for him.

First, we woke up and went to church with him, as he always likes to go and give thanks. Then we came home and made breakfast. I made bacon and The Girl made French Toast for everyone.

Then I did the dishes.

The Boy had to run out and work on yet another project for school, and was gone all afternoon. The Girl wanted to watch the end of "Night at the Museum", so I watched it again with her. She got so excited at some of the parts - let's just say I rarely hear her scream like that. When it was over, she said, "That was great! We should GET this movie!"

We hung out and read for awhile, then K and The Girl wanted to go to the park to break in her new soccer cleats. So I went with them and read on the grass with the dog. It's not often we go to the park anymore, so it was a fun change.

We came home and I started a pot of Gumbo for dinner. I diced and saute'd and got everything to the point where it could cook for awhile on the stove. Then I went outside and we all swam for awhile. It was cool in the water, which felt great after getting tired and sweaty from cooking in the kitchen!

Then I came inside and took a shower, and asked The Boy (home now from doing his project) to start some water to boil on the stove for rice. When I got out of the shower, I added the rice to the water and the meat to the Gumbo.

When the rice was done and the meat heated through, it was time to eat. This Gumbo recipe completely fills my largest pot, and the family ate 2/3 of it last night! K and I ate the rest of it today.

Yummy, that file' gumbo is good stuff. I'll post the recipe soon.

After dinner we watched the other dvd I'd rented, "Ghost Rider", until it was 10pm and time for Entourage.

Another guilty indulgence.

We watched the end of "Ghost Rider" later - K thought it was funny, and he loves motorcycles, so it was all good.

Audition

Monday I took The Girl for a TV show audition she was interested in. To her credit, she didn't want to miss any school for it, so we went after school. I'd never been to one before, so I thought it would be better to go early, but going later turned out well, as it was not crowded at all. We filled out some forms, and were sent to "holding area," walking through a room that was crisscrossed with bands to hold a long, long line. Whew! Glad we missed that!

Before we heard about the audition, we were preparing to send in a tape. The online instructions were to send a tape with just talking - no singing, art, acts of any kind. The instructions for the live audition? Wear a costume! Bring the whole family! Have the whole family dress up in costume! Show and tell or recite something. WTF?

What is the purpose of dressing in costume to audition for a show that doesn't use costumes? Personally I think they wanted us to look as foolish as possible, so they can do a show about the crazy people who showed up to audition. But I'm cynical. Maybe they're really casting a completely different show and didn't want anyone to know.

So The Girl dressed up as an artist (hat, paintbrush) and showed some of her artwork and awards. She was speaking softly at first and kept bending down, but when they started asking her questions, she perked up and spoke more audibly and enthusiastically. I thought she gave some great answers.

It was her first audition, after all. If you don't count trying out for her school's talent show. She was REALLY nervous about that first talent show. So it was an adventure for us, and kind of fun. It was fun to listen to the kids in our group and their answers to different questions. One girl said when she grows up she wants to be a Director, Producer, Mary-Kay Salesperson, or a Talk-Show host. Another was practically a professional, and said she does community theater.

My Girl said it best: "How are they ever going to pick just 25 out of ALL THOSE KIDS?"

I was most happy about getting my parking validated, because paying for parking at that location would have made it a pretty expensive day! Yay for asking questions! Sometimes you have to ask more than once.

On the Cusp

I have no money expected to come in in the near future, yet I have more opportunities springing up than ever. Will I eventually cash in on any of them? Hopefully, several! Thinking positive, right? That's supposed to be the secret.

Also, I have yet to fall into a reasonably productive routine. I've been playing tennis fairly consistently, which is important, but takes up nearly my whole morning 2-3 days a week. The rest of the mornings it's hard for me to get started.

So everyday I ask myself, what's most important today? What things can I do better than anyone else? So I run errands and lately have started some things that needed doing. But most of all, I find myself putting more thought into our meals. Last Sunday I asked The Boy to help w/breakfast, so I (with The Girl's help) made pancakes and he made the rest of it, and it was a really nice family Sunday experience. We cooked together, then ate together.

In my Girl's 4th Grade class Open House, she showed me her essay on the wall of essays titled "My Mom". It was so cute. I guess she really enjoys playing tennis with me (hard core tennis, she called it), and she talked about how good my cooking is. She talked about my recipe for scrambled eggs "Mom's Special Eggs" and how she knows what the secret ingredient is. So she thinks cooking is kindof fun to do together, too.

Other than questionable productivity, another thing that's hard to schedule in is creative time. Even reading seems like too much of a luxury - I feel guilty because I should be accomplishing something. I guess I'm too sleepy for guilt in the morning. It takes awhile for the fog to clear.

Last night K wanted to watch sports, and as he scanned the channels he noticed a hockey game was on. He tuned in, and said, "The Ducks are going to win the Stanley Cup!" They were leading Ottawa 5-2. I watched them play for awhile, amazed that anyone ever scores with the Goalie wearing such big gear and blocking the small goal and everything. Then the Ducks scored again! It was awesome, and I don't even follow hockey. It happened so quickly, the Goalie didn't even see it coming. The Anaheim Ducks were one really happy team.

I don't understand what the big mystery about Phil Spector is. Why so long to bring him to trial or convict him? One look at his hair is all you need to know that he's crazy. Even Ronnie Spector said that he used to hold her hostage in the house with a gun. He told his driver that night that he thought he killed somebody! It's pretty obvious that he did it.

I was so sad to hear about the missing girl from KS being found dead yesterday. Something about the pictures of her exuded beauty and light. Someone tried to jump into the Pope's little car yesterday too. What vibes are in the air? Why do goodness and light sometimes attract evil? It makes me sad. I wish we had more control over what we attract.

I need to attract some money.

Moving Pictures

Over the Memorial Day weekend I kept going to Rosie's blog, and it was great. I like watching her little videos and read answers to lots of questions. My husband and son don't understand - both of them asked me if I was obsessed.

It's not that bad, people!


I must be emotional lately, because movies are making me cry.

Saved
I just got around to seeing this movie, and I really liked it. Mandy Moore is so good and funny in this part. I really liked Patrick Fugit and Jena Malone too. All the actors were good and the story was excellent. It hit close to home, so that's probably why I cried.

Because of Wynn & Dixie
Can you believe I cried? How sappy can you get? A dog is lost and boo, hoo, hoo. The little girl who played this part had the biggest eyes I've ever seen! She's like one of those pictures from the 70's of those little kids with huge eyes. It's a little disturbing, because they're just so beautiful, but they're on the face of a little girl.

Open Water
OK, I just watched the end because I wanted to see how it turned out before I spent 2 hours watching people struggle to stay alive in the ocean. I didn't like the end. It sucked. But I didn't cry. I may still go ahead and watch the beginning now, but it's just so sad. I am NEVER going out with a tour group on the ocean, that's for sure!

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I have a digital camera that runs on a couple of AA batteries, so I probably should get a better one. Any suggestions of a good yet not-too-expensive camera?

When I take a picture, I know that sometime after I hit the button, the camera will take a picture. How long this takes varies, depending on the status of the battery.

If I think something is going to happen, say in a game, I press the button and hope for the best. This has resulted in some crazy pictures, though. Like the matrix-like photo above.

I like it.

Feeling Better

I could barely wake up yesterday, and felt low, negative energy all day.

I finally decided I had a headache, and took a couple pills. I still fell asleep in the car while waiting at soccer practice. I slept SO much. I'm sure it's PMS, which I hate.

It was so bad yesterday, that I avoided making any calls, because all that bad energy was making things go wrong and suddenly nothing seemed possible. I tried to think positive thoughts and get to a positive-feeling place, but it wasn't happening.

I hate it when I feel like that - like everything's just a little too hard and I can't do it anymore.

I'm so glad I'm feeling better today. It's amazing how you take for granted feeling good until you feel badly.

The Boy has been feeling under the weather too. He had his wisdom teeth pulled a week ago, and seemed to suffer a LOT more than I did. Then, he came down with a cold. So his jaw hurt, and he had a sore throat.

Then he went to the Prom over the weekend, and stayed up all night. So now his jaw hurts, he has a cold, and he's exhausted. Poor kid.

The Girl has been doing well. She said she was having trouble breathing after practices, so I took her to the Dr. They said she has "Exercise Induced Asthma" and gave her an inhaler. She's very excited about that.

She and a couple of friends decided to enter the school's Talent Show, and got together THE DAY BEFORE AUDITIONS with only an hour to develop their act!

Now I know where the phrase "get your act together" comes from. If you want to have an act, you have to get it together!

Amazingly, they came up with a dance and it was really cute! They got accepted into the show, so they must have performed it pretty well with only a little practicing.

Later that week she came up with another act for the Girl Scout talent show, which was very low key. We took our dog, and she did a cute dance and induced the dog with treats to dance along with her. It was very cute.

To help her out, I got the great idea of not feeding the dog that morning. The Boy came home from school hungry, and made 3 Toad-in-the-holes to eat. He took them downstairs to the coffee table, then came back upstairs for some hot sauce. When he returned, the dog had eaten one of his eggs!

He was SO mad at the dog because he was SO hungry, but I told him that the dog probably was too. It was my fault, because of my bright idea to not feed him.

Don't judge me. I learn a little something every day.

Idol Chatter

The View

I missed yesterday's fireworks between Rosie and Elizabeth. It's just as well, I was getting uncomfortable with them yelling at each other and not listening during the last week or so. Elizabeth is even worse now that she's pregnant. I think being pregnant can make women more self-righteous and she's more argumentative than ever.

I just don't like it when they don't LISTEN to each other, and no one can get a word in edgewise now, because Elizabeth keeps giving more than one example and repeating herself. That doesn't seem like a real debate if no one else can talk.

It was a mistake for Rosie to think E would stick up for her, as she never agreed with her in the first place. Elizabeth would rather claim that she didn't understand what Rosie was trying to say, which was: If we were Iraqis, who would WE feel were terrorists? The people who invaded their country - that's who.

It's not rocket science, tho I'm not sure the metaphor was correct. Since we've invaded their country, we're more likely seen as oppressors, not terrorists. Terrorists are people without power who want to make a big statement, and I think we're as much at risk with people like that originating within our country (i.e. Oklahoma bombing, school shootings, etc.) as from without. But it's almost certainly our policies that create such anger towards us.

I was glad to see that Rosie likes Amy Winehouse too.

http://www.rosie.com/blog/


American Idol

OK, I think 2 HOURS is too long to milk a show that's only going to reveal what you want to see in the last few minutes. And that's not even counting the Red Carpet event that they tacked on in front of it.

Paula Abdul's nose looked fine - not broken at all.

So I kept switching channels until the end - boy, Dustin is still fighting with people on Celebrity Fit Club. He was arguing with one of the judges that he didn't even need to lose weight - to the point where the judge tried to get up and kick his ass! Why is he on the show if he doesn't want to lose weight?

And what's this about a porn tape of Dustin? Never heard of it.

Jordan sounded wonderful last night, so I'm glad she won.

Do you think I watch too much TV?

If nobody lied

I feel like I've been in a fog all day. Like I've been walking around with songs flying around my head. Sad, disappointed songs.

Maybe it would help if I didn't keep playing them over and over again on the cd player or itunes. Ya think?

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If everyone cared,
and nobody cried
If everyone loved
and nobody lied

If everyone shared
and swallowed their pride
There'd be a day
when nobody died
-Nickelback
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I heard somewhere that the goal of parenting a teenager is similar to that of a 2 year old - to get through it with your relationship intact. Right now I feel like I don't know how to do that anymore. I feel like our relationship is changing RIGHT NOW, and I don't know how to change that.

I checked up on the Boy yesterday, and in addition to all the things he's done lately, I find out he's lying to me. I guess I always knew that he could be, but I always hope he's not.

But now I find out that he is, and I don't know how to trust him anymore. Whatever he says to me now, I'm like "whatever". Is it a lie? I don't know.

He tried to deflect trouble by saying that if I read his Myspace, that was a big violation of his privacy. I told him I had several methods and didn't want him to know what they were. He said I wasn't denying it, so finally I did. But I didn't look him in the eye.

And I could feel him looking at me in confusion, wondering if I was telling the truth or not. And I felt like saying, "How does it fucking feel?"

I don't know why I'm taking it personally, I know it isn't meant that way. It's not as if I was above lying when I was that age.

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Flames to dust
lovers to friends
why do all good things
come to an end?
-Nelly Furtado
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I guess it just makes me sad that he's not my fun Boy anymore. He's forcing me to be the "Bad Guy", and altho I've always been a parent more than a friend, it seems he's not any part my friend anymore. He never wants to be with us, that's for sure. But perfectly normal, I know.

I just miss the days when he was younger. As much as I feel I'm losing him now, I can only hope that someday he comes back to be my friend again.

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Later he came to me and admitted his lie - tho I think I'd backed him into a place where he had to. He says he's sorry and he won't do it anymore.

He's almost done with his Junior year, so he's close to being a Senior. So I don't know how much control I can continue to have of him anyway. I know some parents who are like, "My son's a senior now, so he does what he wants."

The problem with the Boy (and also a few of his friends) is that they're doing things now that could sabotage themselves.